Step 1: Buy a new house.

Step 2: Let your brother-in-law leave town on vacation.

Step 3: Have random house projects.

Step 4: Fuck it. I can get this done myself.

Step 5: Caulk* window in shower AND replace thermostat.

Step 6: Feel a fine sense of accomplishment on how much ass I kicked.

 *Please note: Caulk is pronounced (cah-k). Yes, that’s right. COCK. I said it.